Bun parity: preserve Windows TCP reset identity and event ordering

Tracks genuine Windows reset failures from #66: socket-reset-send, connect-reset-after-destroy, connect-reset-until-connected, and net-server-reset.\n\nAcceptance criteria:\n- implement resetAndDestroy through true socket termination or SO_LINGER reset\n- preserve WSAECONNRESET as Node ECONNRESET instead of collapsing it to ECONNREFUSED\n- emit read ECONNRESET without a normal end event\n- query and preserve connect-time SO_ERROR before libuv status is collapsed\n- invoke write callbacks and close events exactly once with Node-compatible ordering\n- add established, pre-connect, and connect-race native Windows regressions\n\nParent tracker: #66

Implementation is complete locally in b1fcb36 (push queued by github.com DNS failure). resetAndDestroy now reaches true native termination for named pipes, and connect/read failures preserve ENOENT, EADDRINUSE, ECONNRESET, and ECONNREFUSED instead of collapsing them. Fatal read/write errors no longer flush as graceful FIN. Focused error-identity and ownership tests pass; the expectation gates remain until real Windows runs verify event ordering.